How To Deal With Obsessive Worrying

There’s no way for me to be able to write this without feeling like a hypocrite.
I am an avid overthinker.

But, with that being said, I am not an obsessive overthinker. Not anymore, at least.
So allow me to help you with that.

I noticed myself to have an overwhelming sense of anxiety starting in the first year of me going into university. I am not quite sure it is because of me being thrown into a brand new place (East Malaysia), literally an ocean away from the warmth of my family and friends (Peninsular Malaysia), but it did started at that moment, as far as I noticed.

It is definitely a period where I got too anxious deciding between options. And whenever I choose one, my mind would ruminate all over what would happen if I did choose the other choice (although the initial choice works perfectly well).

So how did I overcome it?
By realizing that all the worries are just thoughts.

I owe big time to Dean Graziosi about this, when I encountered him saying this particular quote in his IG stories. And as far as I noticed, it is one of the things that he kept reminding his followers about:

“Instead of thinking what could go wrong, think about what could go right!”

Imagine a normal day of yours, waking up, and getting ready to go to work.

What could go wrong?

Traffic jam. Car accidents. Traffic jam because of car accidents. You got in a car accident. You get hit. You hit someone. You’re late to the office. Your boss suddenly fires you for no reason. You got a news that a closed one has died. Your pet died. You house is flooded and you don’t even know. A zombie apocalypse suddenly occurs.

Yikes, right?

Okay, now imagine, what could go right? What good things that can happen?

You get to work super early. Your boss raises your salary and position. Better yet, you won a lottery, so you quit your job instantly. You won a lucky draw. People make way of you on the roads to the office. Your crush suddenly confesses his/her love too. You won a holiday ticket. Your workplace suddenly got an upgrade.

Do you start to get it now?

Even when you’re just imagining it, the possibility of both the best and the worst thing that can happen to you, is equal (which both the extremes are extremely unlikely).

My point is, just like how unexpected bad things has happened to you, unexpected good things has happened to you too.

And, another figure that I owe to is Gary Vaynerchuck, who puts it in a very simple way:

“You would never know what happened until you actually just choose one option.
So just choose one and go.”

It seems like common sense at the time. But it took me an overwhelming stress and anxiety, to actually digest the essence of what he said.

No matter how much I worry, I would never, ever, be someone who knows the future. So why would I worry like one?

With that being said, being an avid overthinker myself, I am not here to tell you to “not worry”, “not overthink” and “just brush it off.” I fully aware that it does not work that way.

But, as I said, those two quotes really helped me in reducing anxiety whilst I’m overthinking. I am aware that the worst things that could happen that I’m overthinking about, are just thoughts in my head. Just like the worst thing could happen, the best thing could also happen. And despite my overthinking, I would never be able to control something that is out of my control.

Thus, even with that overthinking,
even with that anxiety,
even with that fear,
I just choose, or find a solution, and move on with life.

I hope this post helps clear some things up about obsessive worrying and overthinking. Like I said, to those people who don’t experience it, they may not be able to understand that it is not something that we simple can “switch off”.

But ultimately, I hope it helps you to keep moving on with living, despite the constant
worrying, fear and anxiety in your head.

That is what matters.